after the shoot it only gets worse as now you did decide to take the time off finally to just get smtieme for yourself.....
and you just be listening to hsi music from the very start and reading this book on paintings and the start of it all.....
again when mind that lost nothing really getting into the head and head out for your usual late nite walk and that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuty every time when the world around feels that beauuutifully slow cant hear a thing and then to just be walking aroudn with his music playing low.... like you can feel the beat more and with it that feeeeeeel of him him.....
looking up at the sky clouds coming going looking around and then just be for a bit in a corner and eyes shut and that sudden brush of the wind everytime and that beautiful feeeeeel with it......
mind feels much better head back home...
like all through the day theer was not even for a bit some thought even for a sec otherwise anything closest to bhi bout the moments lived with him....
like nothing nowhere even close....
once home legs up in the air and still reading with his music playing and again donno when you passed out.... and these moments again cant write bout but that feeeeeeeeel of his presence like with every moment it was like he was making you feeeel his presence.... like it was to make you feel make you realize his presence......
to this one moment when in the middle of the moment he just holds your hand and starts saying you promised me but you promised me....
like he holds your hand that tight and keeps repeating teh same thing like you couldnt see him but could just feel him feeel his hand feel his touch feeel his hand that tightly holdingyour hand away in his and repeating the same thing and you try to turn to his side trying to tell him smthing and you wake up.....
it was that state of mind that you still were in cause of the moments lived and then that echo of his voice and then to live this reality side of it was like toooooo much for your mind to tackle understand make sense or even deal with....
like it was anger sudden upsetness lostness donnooo what it was but it was that strong smthing that you couldnt make sense of....
like you were in a way sort of talking back to your mind why think of smthing like this when you knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww !!!!!!!!!
like whooo hotaaa nai sudden see ekdum seee kuch samaj nii ataaa like kaikuuuuuuuu ye saaab feeeeeel kara naaa..... nai samaj araaa thaa charlie !!!!!!!!!
like whyyy make your mind make you all of you feeel that and then to wake up this side of it ......
that smell of him even as you were up with that feeeeeel of him still on your mind still over your hand and all and that echo of his voice.....
and as you promised him for being there no matter what do as that and unblock him away.....
that moment you lived in the dream was smthing you had actually lived for real too with him.....
that very same moment....
when after the moments or actually in the middle of the moment he suddenly breaks down and tells you never to leave him like his parents now are.....
like that was the day it was going to get official and makes you promise him that youll be one person that will never leave him no matter what....
actually holds your hand and makes you promise and say the same thing like repeat it, to know youll never leave him no matter what !!
you make a zillion promises throughout your life some random some not so random....
but there is that one promise you make that concsiously or subconsciously lasts for a lifetime.....
like that one promise of your life that stays no matter what happens, that one promise just stays...
like you dont intentionally decide on that but all of you just knows it like this one is for a lifetime no matter what...
and for you that one promise of your life is this - to be there with him, for him no matter what...
and you just be listening to hsi music from the very start and reading this book on paintings and the start of it all.....
again when mind that lost nothing really getting into the head and head out for your usual late nite walk and that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuty every time when the world around feels that beauuutifully slow cant hear a thing and then to just be walking aroudn with his music playing low.... like you can feel the beat more and with it that feeeeeeel of him him.....
looking up at the sky clouds coming going looking around and then just be for a bit in a corner and eyes shut and that sudden brush of the wind everytime and that beautiful feeeeeel with it......
mind feels much better head back home...
like all through the day theer was not even for a bit some thought even for a sec otherwise anything closest to bhi bout the moments lived with him....
like nothing nowhere even close....
once home legs up in the air and still reading with his music playing and again donno when you passed out.... and these moments again cant write bout but that feeeeeeeeel of his presence like with every moment it was like he was making you feeeel his presence.... like it was to make you feel make you realize his presence......
to this one moment when in the middle of the moment he just holds your hand and starts saying you promised me but you promised me....
like he holds your hand that tight and keeps repeating teh same thing like you couldnt see him but could just feel him feeel his hand feel his touch feeel his hand that tightly holdingyour hand away in his and repeating the same thing and you try to turn to his side trying to tell him smthing and you wake up.....
it was that state of mind that you still were in cause of the moments lived and then that echo of his voice and then to live this reality side of it was like toooooo much for your mind to tackle understand make sense or even deal with....
like it was anger sudden upsetness lostness donnooo what it was but it was that strong smthing that you couldnt make sense of....
like you were in a way sort of talking back to your mind why think of smthing like this when you knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww !!!!!!!!!
like whooo hotaaa nai sudden see ekdum seee kuch samaj nii ataaa like kaikuuuuuuuu ye saaab feeeeeel kara naaa..... nai samaj araaa thaa charlie !!!!!!!!!
like whyyy make your mind make you all of you feeel that and then to wake up this side of it ......
that smell of him even as you were up with that feeeeeel of him still on your mind still over your hand and all and that echo of his voice.....
and as you promised him for being there no matter what do as that and unblock him away.....
that moment you lived in the dream was smthing you had actually lived for real too with him.....
that very same moment....
when after the moments or actually in the middle of the moment he suddenly breaks down and tells you never to leave him like his parents now are.....
like that was the day it was going to get official and makes you promise him that youll be one person that will never leave him no matter what....
actually holds your hand and makes you promise and say the same thing like repeat it, to know youll never leave him no matter what !!
you make a zillion promises throughout your life some random some not so random....
but there is that one promise you make that concsiously or subconsciously lasts for a lifetime.....
like that one promise of your life that stays no matter what happens, that one promise just stays...
like you dont intentionally decide on that but all of you just knows it like this one is for a lifetime no matter what...
and for you that one promise of your life is this - to be there with him, for him no matter what...
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