How to n where to begin with ?!

Some days its just that bit easier and on some you just donnooooo how to or where to begin with.....

like theres that much that needs to be out and also that one ting at the back of your  mind knowing you cant let it all out....

but like ever since this one realization sinking in of it being one complete year like the more you wanna ignore the more waaaaays it comes right in your day.... like kahi se thoo bi that one thing just comes out in any form....

that one complete year of block where you thot you couldnt survive even the first month or for that matter the first day into it.....

and just like that its been that one year of a thing !!

again smthings dates can do to you especially when you keep going back to reading that one line over n over again most times from the chat hau. now. and in your mind read it as his signature line from back then.... when the missing used to get worse even after being with him the complete day that one line from how now karely......

and years after read the sound of a similar line like that one feeeeeeeeling i swear the sec you see him sending that text.....

for a different reason with a different meaning but in your mind evrytime now you read it that beauuuuuutiful familiarity of the same sound...

how now ?!

again now when you read for a different reason......

and just like that when you werent sure how to where to begin with this beauuuuuuuuuuuty of writing him and just like that it flows.......

also why you struggled to stay away from writing all this while..... the state of mind you urself were hiding away from and dint really want to write it out and then read your mind as you write....

like always could have possibly gotten worse !!

and today or yesterday or last few days this ironic beauty of smthings - beyond words beyond worlds i say !!!!!!!!!!!

and yet again when he was missed like never before...!