To feeeeel!!!!!!

 It’s that thing charlie like from the very start the waaaay just watching him walk towards you held you him just looking you through the mirror tying his shoe lace and then just stops and stay that way living your presence away and you for the first time in your life actually looking at a guy constantrrrrrrrly not looking away not moving or walking away just living that moment with him…

Like it takes that gym instructor to actually shake you to stop looking at him and listen to what she had to say…..to the other zillion times when you just looooioooved living him away to that closeness of him when he would his head bump intentionally against yours knowing bout your habit of hitting your head back again and that feeeeeel inside everytime you went closer it’s that beauuuuuutiful calm and chaos all at once….it’s that familiar feeeel of having been ther before and revisiting again kinda vibe to the times later when he started to leave his buttons open first few of his shirt and the first time you see him that way and you look directly over and the waaaaaaaaaay he waits for you to look up at him and that nod and smiiiiiile of his!!!!!!

To the next time there was another one more open and that feeeeeeeeeeel of actually loving hair that wayyyy toooo to just realise that heading back home how much you loooooved that moemnt of just living him that way……

When one time you ask him why he didn’t wear a shirt that day and comes wearing tee to pick you up he directly takes a turn heads home changes back into a shirt and comes out in the car whilst you wait there asks you a shirt this way or this way and you couldn’t say a word with that feeeeel of oh shit he knew it!!!!!!

Leaves it your way and that smiiiiile through n through like you remember not saying a word for wyiteeee sometime!!!!!!

It’s like today all those ziluuuuuoon times you loooooved liiiiiiiived him that way be it back then or in your dreams even now rush through you!!!!!

Anybody normal without no something for this long and some closed space moment like that would’ve felt otherwise but in you there wasn’t even a slightest of ting even in some corner it was like all your senses were that beautifully numb like couldn’t feel a thing leave alone a ting…

And whennnnn it comes to him even a visual of him that way even writing it now hits away the biggest of tongs away I say and HOW!!!!!!!!

It’s like you are wired away with all things Him…

The core of you the inside the outside the around anything you is this beautifully wired away with all things Him, anybto wverything him!!!!!!