Monday 8 April 2019

to live him...

to live his presence for real - happiness beyond words of the world or planets i say !!!!!!!!

and then to live his presence or just feeeeeeel his presence this way!!!!!!!

smthing else....

its this state of mind this weird feeeling of not being able to read him read those moments lived read those different waaaaaaays that you felt him lived him with your eyes shut to just let that feeeling sink in of it being deleted.... to this one movie that your friend suggests you watch completely cause you walked out half way through the movie.... right before she leaves for her holiday or honeymoon as they cheeezily call it.....

like she meets you and asks you to def watch this one movie...

this one movie not sure if it was the same one that you walked out but like you ignore a few days and then that one ting that keeps tinging on your mind and you finally decide to watch it....

only after watching realizing it was from teh same movie that you looooved the song from and only after watching realize what it was bout or the movie was bout....

there are a zillion movies you watch some make sense some move you some are a cinematic genius allowing you to have an experience....

and this one movie the waaaay it felt like it almost was eevrything almost everything youve lived...

like living moments reliving moments as you watch some film...

it was that beautifully ironical cause all you could feeel live was him through n through !!!!!

if not for the after love part of them coming together again....but just the love part of it !!!!!!

the Him part of it !!!!!!!

and the after state of mind form the movie to living another dream again could be the after effect of watching the movie.... but that one dream and again moves you.....

in a way that you do your best to avoid to keep your mind off though there was that thing bout it being maybe cause of watching the film and being moved by the film and HOW but smthings nai you just cant help..... this one dream too was one of those !!!!!!

to today when you have this urge to write out and couldnt write out there and almost slipped bout writing one here.... the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay you felt him !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

again one of those waaaaaaaaays when you feeel him the waaaaaaay it just makes you wanna be there with him no matter where he is like to just runnnnn to somewhere with that hope of reaching somewhere wherever  he is !!!!

to just runnnnnn to him !!!!!!!!!

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