Waking up!!!!

 Been feeling weird lately not knowing how to even get a hold on your mind with this him rush lately!!!!

To this sudden need to get away from it all after not being able to live that lilst bit of him too now that the manager was fired and you just can’t see him!!!!!

And the waaaaaay it has always left this impact on you it’s that wordless weird feeelinf charlie can’t write out how it feels these words recently that showed the desperation of having to see him touch him feel him for real except for the cruelty bit in it was that much more relatable the rest of it!!

It’s this restlessness missing him away that makes you touch your own arm away post his dreams of him feeling you away….it’s different the way you rub your own arm away roughly it’s that need that longing for his arm for his touch specially post his dreams!!!!!

Cause the dreams lately is that beautiful fuel to the fire already!!!!!!

As crazy as that sounds that’s the only way to say it!!

To this one this morning it’s this habit of yours when you kiss him too much to just be on your own away exploring some new cafe with these new ones opening every other day……you just be there with a coffee and just people watch around with music playing in your ears…

It’s like that constant search for him and seeing somebody look similar to him and smile away shut your eyes and picture him there with you even standing at the counter there’s that strong longing to feel him see him stand beside you with you right there sharing the coffee away sharing that moment that same space that same air away!!

And this one you on your own same exact listening to music and this was this you now not the pehle one……and eyes shut living him away in your mind and open your eyes and you see him walk towards your table and this him was the now him black collared tee his same jeans and walks up to your table with that same smiiiiiiiule on him and says what’s up like it was just yesterday like it was just yesterday youd met him and today there he was…….

Pulls the chair and sitting down he leans over your side bringing his face closest to yours and keeps the coffee on the table and just slightly raises his arms and that rush in you even as you live that beauuuuuuuuuuty of him looking his sexy best with fulllll daaaaaaadi and you couldn’t take your eyes off his daaadi cause your mind was playing that scent of his daaadi in your head like any closer you could possibly smell his scent away kinda mind play!!!!!!

Raising his arms he stands a lil and you rush to his side and hold him and he makes that same sound knowing just knowing how bad you’d missed him like the same sound back from Bangalore first hug you hold him and he makes that same sound!!!!!

That same sound as you hold him and he holds back tighter and a lil more tighter!!!!!

That one feeeeeeeeeeeeeeel of being held by all him around and over to feeeel it live it after all these years and that very same way that you’d missed him in even writing now this feeeeeeeel again!!!!!!!

Right now this missing again!!!!!!!!