All feels!!!!

 It's that feeeeling chalrie when you are that full of something and something else clashes with it you just don't know how to react or get terms with it....

It's like that in that moment you that bad wanted to write it away evrything all at once to just get it out of you cause it was much of Him rushing through you and later it was that sudden realisation that you were hit with and suddenly lost to knowing if you write it the after feels would lead to another writing which you woldnt want to write out that state of mind you wokdnt want to write it and feel the words worse after writing out...

It's like every time you write it out the feel level feel meter turns up to a zillion notches high i say!

Good or bad it always peaks up!

Now to writing this out you sure know the after feels of writing but this one music piece and the way it just resonated with you that feeeel of layers of his memories when there that pretty close feel vibe from that day cause there were these temple bells ringing just like back then with that breeze in the air sometimes and other time with the aarti to those same sound of temple bells from the dreams of his that literally was the only thing that helped you survive his absence over the years and now that's gine too...

That day to just be there listening to those very same temple bells connecting with the dreams his presence with eyes shut and his ancient astronaut playing on loop was magic that one hour pure magic of all Him!!!!!!

There's nobody that you would could love again you are done with it.....the way he called it wasting your love on someone cause he didn't love you anymore...

U can't decide the timeline of love charlie cabt decide if you are not being loved back you got to stop this love from your side all this while till you went there there was thus feeling of confusion with his words on loop in whispers that you could almost hear him tell you over you wasting your love and lal that when alone all you could hear.....

And the way it was making you feel, once there that one realisation it's all the love you had to give to live to love and grow with grown with...and that surprisingly still exists and breathes the same as it did back then but definitely grown than it was back then...

It was that sense of "belonging" charlie that you felt the most most importantly...it was strong and the most beautiful feeling!

What felt later once home is another story....but that feel of coming alive that completely fully in the most you way was something else!