This dream....

that one thing that sort of now is all you look forward for the sec you sleep live him in some way....

kaise bhi even for the lilst of time bhi to just live him for a bit soon as you sleep....

this time when you did decide and did delete him for the longest of time ever after knowing he has someone....

like this time it was for real that you did decide never again....

and it did last for over a month or so prolly the longest ever till date and that was till this dream happened....

you still donno what the dream was even bout but then again just the waaaay it made you feel....

that it stayed with you just stayed with you....

even writing it now these flashes of him rushing through you even as you write the dream or words now....

this thing charlie now as you write it still feels confusing dosnt make any sense but in that dream the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay it just made you feel his presence him pulling your t shirt closer to him like literally pulling you closer to him as you keep stepping back n away from him.....

some moments you cant just cant define out in words... how or what they made you feel like in that very moment !!

like he was sleeping with his back then usual on tummy sleeping pose of his.....

and you just stand there living his presence making sure you dont go any closer and this brush of wind and the way he slowly turns over and starts to sniff away your presence again exaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaactly what and how your mornings most of the mornings are now like.... sniffing away his presence.... and watching him do that exact same thing was smthing else so much so that it makes you stay there and still watch him....

and the waaaaaaaaay he slowly opens his eyes that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutifully still battering away his long lashes beauuuuuuuuuuuutiful sleeepy eyes and that one adoooooooooooooooooooooooooooorable smile and before you even make sense the waaaaaaaaay that sameeeeeeeee waaaaaaaaaaaay same tone of his back then karelyyyyyyyy ye color kaikuuu pehnii tuu nai pasand merkuu ye color terpe nai kareelyyyy not this color and still telling you so in that same ambeingadorableandiknowit kid tone of his pulls you closer to him and tries to literally tries to tear that corner part of your tee and still keeps pulling you closer its when you suddenly realize its not all the same anymore.... and you try to move back taking steps away and more you move away the waaaaaaaaaaaay he keeps pulling your tee and you closer to him and tells you math jaaaa pls mathh jaaaaaa and keeps repeating the same thing with his eyes closed he sounded a lil drunk but his eyes that beauuuuuuuuutifully sleepy and a lil high....

like you could sense that in his adooooooorable shy smile it was the post high smile of his.....

still asking you not to leave and the same sec again opens his eyes and sees the tee and goes back  to saying the same thing kaikuuuu ye color pehniii karelyyyy tuuuuuu mathh jaaaaa na.....

to just live him in that moment having lived a similar moment back then where him still sleepy and you just be there cause he wanted to see you first thing soon as he wakes up and you just stand there living that adooooooooooooorably beauty of his and he smells your presence and holds you away by the leg making sure you were closer to him....

that very same vibe of this dream with a different reality.... him trying making you stay closer to him that one tone of his voice that youve known that one face of his that complete vibe of that dream shakes you up and you wake up..... the first thing was to look at what color you were wearing it was this grey tone pink tee not the good tone pink and this also was smthing again back then when you used to wear pink lip color him asking you gettig mad at you for wearing that color cause he dint like it a bit....

fw secs of looking at that tee on you the very next sec wake up change the tee and go back to sleep with that wait in you hoping to stand back to that very place where you could live him again from that very same moment and show him that youve changed your tee.....

it was that restless feeeeling him holding you wanting you to stay in that one tone of his voice that makes you go weak like nothing else could....

actually charlie Him your only strength and your only weakness in life....

it makes you happy like nothing else in the world and also the very same thing that could break you like nothing in the world could !!