Thursday 23 April 2020

Beam of light...

and then there are moments like these.....

the only outing for now late evening post workout walks....

today out for the walk usual, the guy that helped you with the groceries comes along and asks you if you were okay if he joined and finally introduces himself as yash.... usual intro and asking you what you do n stuff and him into food business....

it was weird today this time.... usually its you running away avoiding interactions like these....

not sure why even be it a casual one this time today you did.... like you still were there and dint run away this time....

maybe it had to do with that one feeling thats always been there with you the feel of belonging to someone and suddenly now you donno where you belong to....

its not there anymore....

it was a friendly conversation to jokes on food and the food business to him telling you bout how he pursued architecture first to being an interior designer and now finally landed with the food business.... like he was funny and only today did you realize you actually laughed like that after years.... or for that matter had some conversation non work the attention on you kinda conversation... like you know someone listening wanting to have that conversation wanting to share smthing with you kinda good conversation.... and not in the flirtatious way like a genuine good conversation....

like it was almost a good hour past your walk time and it was that one moment just that one moment....

with his music still playing with usual one ear plugged into his music.... that one moment as you take the turn and he asks you stop just there and thats when you actually look up at him.... and he says how your eyes light up and look even browner as the beam of light falls upon your face....

in less than a flash of a sec there was Him.....

evrything that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutifully just Him......

the sudden flash of Him looking at you and telling you to move your face a lil to this side so its directly pointing towards the sunlight and then tells you how your pupils were that big and that brown and how he could see his face in your eyes that clear in that light.... like he was loving that visual of seeing his reflection in your eyes.....

today that one moment with his lucky ali playing and that very similar moment and you just move back and say a bye and walk towards the apartment....... just a moment that one sec of Him and the way it all becomes that beaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuutifully all Him inside of you.....

like through that moment or after all  you could feel live think miss relive was Him.....

there was that weird feeling of not sure what guilt smthing just dint feel right.....

to when yash calls out asking was it smthing someone used to tell you cause your face changed suddenly to if this was your usual time and then asking for your number and you just say a bye and leave....

come back home in your room shut away from everything else light off and just be with his music playing loud....

some moments flash by that quick like you know matter of a second but the impact could last forever.....

those few hours after that moment was all n more bout that....

the impact.....

that one beam of light that one sec of another one of your most loved moments with Him.....

its that feeeeeeeeeeeeeeling charlie who pipe mein se ekdum seeeeeee wooooooooooosh bolke suddenly paani kaise aataaa full force mein.....

it was that same push same force same rush that suddenly rushed all through you, through every vein in your body in that fraction of a second.....

Him rushing through every single vein in your body... just a moment, just a beam of light...!

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