ever since that one moment of living that one visual of having seen him walking hand in hand in the dream the way it just left you with this weird state of mind that you just cant deal with......
like no matter what you do where you go this weird feeling inside !!!!!!!!
like you just cant get over or change it, anyway no matter what you do !!!!!!
and this one term that you come across few days back that you dint know did even exist in some blog...
ghosting !!
like there is actually a behavioral thing like this that exists....
like there is a term for it !!
when someone just leaves without a word for no reason and cuts away all and every source of communication out of nowhere !!
and this happens when the person is not into you - is what it means and said !!
who hotaaa nai charlie kuch dekhe thoo padhe thoo that one loud tangggggggggg that rings - bas that moment same to same as you discover "the" term......
and you suddenly realize hasnt it been this way ever since bup, only this time he did make it that clear in words like it sort of reasoned out all this while of his disappearance like THIS is why he never was in touch or could be with you again kinda thing......
felt way worse than the term weird or worse !!
like all of this all this while sort of lost its meaning only......
suddenly like all that you felt lived dreamt felt like one big dream like all of him back then too living that love of his feeling those moments living him felt like one big most beautiful dream of your life.....
like it dint happen for real wali feeling.....
and this beauty of a Him that only exists in your mind and not actually for real....
as crazy as this sounds right now whilst writing your state of mind then out.....
exactly what and how you felt !!!!!!!
this is when you relate the same exact phases of his disappearance from your life like out of nowhere you wake up and there is a block right after you had a nite long skype or anythign at all like you know the kind of disappearance that you werent least prepared for.....
that it alwasy used to make you re read yoru words a thousand and one times over just to check what it is that you said or did was wrong that couldve lead to the sudden block out of nowhere.....
could never really make sense and always left you with a zillion questions and self doubts....
that day when you read all bout it its that sudden thing call it fate or whatever you are living a dream now....
He was there in that dream back then and continues to do so like few mins back he was.....
madness i know but the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay he feels that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuutifully real in moments like these is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay beyond logics !!!!!!
way beyonder i say !!!!!!!!!!!
like no matter what you do where you go this weird feeling inside !!!!!!!!
like you just cant get over or change it, anyway no matter what you do !!!!!!
and this one term that you come across few days back that you dint know did even exist in some blog...
ghosting !!
like there is actually a behavioral thing like this that exists....
like there is a term for it !!
when someone just leaves without a word for no reason and cuts away all and every source of communication out of nowhere !!
and this happens when the person is not into you - is what it means and said !!
who hotaaa nai charlie kuch dekhe thoo padhe thoo that one loud tangggggggggg that rings - bas that moment same to same as you discover "the" term......
and you suddenly realize hasnt it been this way ever since bup, only this time he did make it that clear in words like it sort of reasoned out all this while of his disappearance like THIS is why he never was in touch or could be with you again kinda thing......
felt way worse than the term weird or worse !!
like all of this all this while sort of lost its meaning only......
suddenly like all that you felt lived dreamt felt like one big dream like all of him back then too living that love of his feeling those moments living him felt like one big most beautiful dream of your life.....
like it dint happen for real wali feeling.....
and this beauty of a Him that only exists in your mind and not actually for real....
as crazy as this sounds right now whilst writing your state of mind then out.....
exactly what and how you felt !!!!!!!
this is when you relate the same exact phases of his disappearance from your life like out of nowhere you wake up and there is a block right after you had a nite long skype or anythign at all like you know the kind of disappearance that you werent least prepared for.....
that it alwasy used to make you re read yoru words a thousand and one times over just to check what it is that you said or did was wrong that couldve lead to the sudden block out of nowhere.....
could never really make sense and always left you with a zillion questions and self doubts....
that day when you read all bout it its that sudden thing call it fate or whatever you are living a dream now....
He was there in that dream back then and continues to do so like few mins back he was.....
madness i know but the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay he feels that beauuuuuuuuuuuuuutifully real in moments like these is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay beyond logics !!!!!!
way beyonder i say !!!!!!!!!!!
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