Echo of his voice...

 It's like after this morning the dream the way you felt him lived him and yet can't write a thing bout it cause of the obvious reasons it's that stronger feel of smthing still connects you to him smthing from him that makes you feel this way it's like what you feel and then being drawn to what and how you felt with his presence... It's as confusing to write out as much and mm ore as it makes you feel.....

Last nite it was that sudden strong feeeel of him as you were watching a pathetic movie like with every scene that one inside self commentary mode akele akele kaise kaise log kya kya movie bana dete and call it trending Hollywood movie Kate.....it's like still having to watch it till the end just like he used to had this saying no matter how bad it is I just can't make myself to get off the movie in between its respecting movies that way respecting the maker and just cant get off a movie beech mein...

And ekdum out of nowhere that strong same feeeeeel of him space out blank and just that rushhhhh of him and you get off head to this other recent spot in your room overlooking the towers beside up at the night sky bean bag placed up his music and just be you weren't even drunk and yet that beauuutifully just high on everything to anything him......

Just living him feeling him vibin away to the way those few hours made you feel it's different charlie it's madness it's beautiful it's confusing it's complicated it's beyond your own mind why how what makes you feel that way but that feeeeeeeling when it hits you off and away just that beautifully off n away....you feel him that strong ii n that moment ki he is almost there like right there in that moment in that silence with you making you feel his love for you....just by being there even in that absence...

It's like you were living that moment of looking up at the night sky with him sitting beside you......missing him that bad missing hearing those words hearing his voice missing him certain ways certain things to just the way that one look and all n more and he is exactly the same with you looking his beautiful best in a olive green shirt and white chaddis and is when in the dream too you tell him how olive green is totally his Color just like yellow navy blue white are......and that same sound of his smile same look with that one smile to the exact words that you missed to feeling living him same way...it was like feeling the same feel twice once when youo missed it second when you dream it!

Last one week as chaotic as it's been hectic as it's been through the process there's been him how not sure but it's been just that bit stronger that bit more beautifully unusual.....

It's not just his dreams anymore it's like he is there in those moments where you know even as you write this you feel see yourself having lost it completely but sometimes you just have to get your mind out there to see how it feels on the inside..... this is exactly how it feels Donno why what how but it just keeps getting stronger not sure with all that planning changes more work or it actually is happening just is what it is like it was back then to make you realise make you feel his love for you even with all that's happened happening with the distance too...to just make you feel he still loves you!

Smthings nai even in your head it felt thaaaaaaaat beauuuuuuutiful to just feel that he still loves you and now as you write and re read it as you write ayaaaa to just keep writing just so you could keep re reading it over again he still loves you whoo hota nai school mein I won't do this again having to write it 10 times thing and today as you write this love for to write it ovwr n over again just cause of the waaaaaay its making you feel!

Some dreams nai and the waaaaaay they can leave you with with a proof on your hand with the Color of his love mark kinda thing that you see this morning...like it wasn't just his smell that you wake up with but with that solid proof!

Absolute sheer level of beautiful madness I say...