Him!!!!!

 Ever since that evening there is this beauuuutiful flashback mode that the mind is on.....it's that beauuuutifully weird cause otherwise too there are moments through the day where younjust zone out and just be reliving him even at work....

And there is this other thing charlie the waaaay the mind just wants to relive all him right from the very start til that meet.....to just be reliving those lilst of details too even as simple as him waiting for you to turn around and look at him just before he heads home like that wait was always there and the waaaaaay it used to make him smile that very sec charlie ayyyaaaaaaaaaaaa that one smile was your life poora ka pooooora life of yours right there in his smile the waaaaaay he just used to smile away that beauuuutifully the sec he looks at you turn and see him.....

To just those sleep whispers of his like you are working on the shoot prepping up for the final designs to be included and suddenly zone out and that need to just be.....

Day before when the model shows up for fitings and you manager and the model were talking bout some final jacket fittings and then some bond movie how it looked that familiar and suddenly that follow request on insta nnd message gues who it is and laughs over it sitting on the couch across the studio and that feeeeeeeeeeling charlie!!!!!!!!

That very similar familiar beauuuutifully familiar feeel!!!!

Where according to the model he has never had a lesb frjend before cause that's what you are now and there's that no need to even clarify that cause it doesn't matter.....it's when you know who matters who doesn't is when effort or the need to ignore counts in...

And to you it's not even friendship it's just an acquaintance cause of your manager the guy doing a favor trying his luck in movies too and hence the portfolio kinda thing and you now a lesb so it's all cool and that simple.....

People you know now are not even people you really know cause you barely know....it's mostly work and once home it's like just you.....and your this time of the day!!!!!

There is no sense of conection or the need to connect.....

That moment when you live that familiar vibe of the moment him all you could see get off and away to the terrace....

Just be yhere and the waaaaay all you could see was just hum charkie from that very moment the way he sends you that text askinf gues who muhahahahaha and as you lok up that one adooooooooooorable face of his and the even more adorable sound of his chuckle!!!!!!

He jus fekt smthing more than just someone random right from that very first miwnnt that you sensed his presence wakkig through the door and towards you looking down at the tiles and walking in his signature style.....

That need to just be there not move even the slightest bit and just live him....without even seeing his face cause all that while he was loking down and inly as he gets close and waits for you to move does he lok up right in the eye is when yi realize you were that close and you move and that one almost smile of his and contjnues to walk along to the changing room and you still looking at him and he turns around reachingthere that sure that you still would be looikg at him.....

It's hust what you feeel fekt in the inside it's different charlie it's beauuuutiful very different.....

That day to live that moment ti live that hun from that similar moment it's that feeeeel charlie of the first memories of his ti relive how you've always felt that smthing for him rught from the start even when you didn't know it was love....

Liek it's always been there and the more you write now this feeeeeeeling!!!!!!!

Some places I tell you the waaaay they bring it all back just like that!!!!!!!