The one day...

 The one day on calendar.....

Exactly why October is your most fav month of the year and December now being the most disliked one!

Cause now you know the complications it comes with every year...

The one month you dread now!

This year too that one long conversation with your mom and this bitter feeeeling iteft your heart with....

At the studio now sitting in ur place wondering if the people who tell you that they really love you care bout you actually do love you or care bout you?!

Or is it mostly and mainly bout em!!!!

When you talk bout or talk to someone do you even give it a second thought as to how or what they might feel like after the words have been spoken after the thought has been put out there.....like do they even think bout it that ways at all???!!

How does wanting you to do smthing ha got to do with what and how you want things to be and here most importantly being your own life in question...

How does you wanting someone to move on so they can you have moved on or got married to ten other people where in question you your life is not how you wanted it to be like......

This one thing smtimes charlie being born as a girl woman why does it seem this difficult complicated smtimes...

Why can't how and what you want to be your life as is never important or asked upon.....why is it always bout how everybody else wants it to be as more important of utmost importance and anything against that will or anything in favor of your own will seems that bloody wrong and against everything and everybody...

Work did become your ultimate escape from things like these just so you could be away from conversations like these for the moment but this one day when you decide to take the day off just so you could be on your own for a bit and off work for one day.....this happens!

How do you call this care bout you wanting best for you when you are shaking that peace of mind someone is looking for hoping for.....why can't my life my decisions choices be mine alone!

When you can't see yourself beside or be with somebody else why is it this difficult to understand afetr all it is you whose life is in question it is you who would have to lead live that life on that would be decided forced by the others!!!!!

Kabhi lagta charlie to just run awayfrom it all kahiii bhii bas door chale jaana away from it all...

This moment today when you see the model wearkmg that white set that you'd designed keeping him in mind....that one feeeeeeeeeeel!!!!!!!

When you look away stay away from looking at that guy directly and just focus on the fittings of the outfit smthings!!!!!

The way that one moment sort of connects away to a zillion other chain of thoughts.....

Where you are still living him in the lilst of moments how do you see someone esle filling up that away!

It was a weird day where you feel a lil more less worth this day that was suppised to be your birthday...

Do peope really care bout the people they love or they think they care bout it's that difference that fine line of what they think is in direct action to how and what they really feel bout!

WWhy is it this difficult to understand if things have changed for someone it doesn't necessarily mean you need to too!

It hasn't changed for you you still are there where you were...cause you still feel the things you did back then and just cause the other doesn't feel the same how does it make sense of yoy should change too!!!!