Baarish !!!!!

 that one rain that one Him.....

some expressions of his from some moments this beauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutifully clear like it was just yesterday.....

aur jab baat uski gaadi ka hotaaa that one faceee he use dto make !!!!!

times when you would galti se bang the dooor and he had to scream but couldnt and just holds that scream and you tell him nai boldee and that one adooooooorableeeee loud screaam karelyyy halllu band kar door zarra....

to that day back from opera and it rains that first n only rain with him....

and you look around and look at him and just by th way you look at him th waaaaaaay that beauuuuutifully smooooth puts the window down and you look out feeel the rain over your face and it rains a lil more and look at him an dthat one faceee as he looks at you and looks att the seat with the rain dorps over and you ask him karaab hotaa nai and he jus nods and sit back windows up and still look around and the waaaaaaaaay he drives slow closer to the trees and puts the windows again and that one looooooook in his eyes that one smileeeeeeeeeeee on him like asking you to set yourself freee.....

and you almost put yourself out half way feeling the rain as he holds onto your leg as you feel the rain and then come back in and hold him away..... it was nothing and yet meant the world everything more to you !!!!!!!!!

to just be loved by him that way............

to just be loved by HIM !!!!!!!!!!!!

it was your everything your all and more !!!!!!!!!

that was when you were the happiest in your life like youve never been again ever !!!!!!!!

that was your HAPPINESS !!!!!!!

having lived very few months but like having lived a lifetime of loving him..... being loved by him !!!!!!

that feeeeeeeling that love that HIM and nothing kabhi kuch nai charlie nothing ever even came close to that one feeeeeeeel that one HIM !!!!!!!!!

that nite by yourself living that moment and living him that feeeeeeeeeeeeeeling it was smthing else !!!!!!!

a place youd that much wished for again smthing that lil but that one wish your heart did make and  you could almost see it visually fade away with time evry  time you passed throuogh that street when there used to be too much traffic on the actual route....

that one feeel to visually live the wish fade away with years....

and then to live him in your mind with his music playing in that very place....

even now as you write his music playing and wirting him out with all these flashes of him his every expresson every face that he used to make his frowns his smirks his adooooooooorable chuckle his stare his just love you wala standard look his that one smileeeeeee every to anything him rushing through you in this moment is why you dont write anymore.....

this feeeeeeeeeeeeeeling it overfills you with !!!!!!!!!!

THIS feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeling !!!!!!!!!!!

ayyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa THAT one him i swear !!!!!!!!!!!!!

kaiseeeeeeee !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

like howwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ayyyaaaaaaaaa woooooooooosh bolkeeeeee jaaan gayaaa unee meri pooori ki pooooori !!!!!!!!!!!

howleeeeeeeeeeeee howleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!