One dream…!

 All it takes is that one dream the continuation that follows after!!!!!

How do you even cope with high hopes dreams like these specially in this state of mind lately!!!!!! 

This was a day or two back when ignoring the rest of the details as it’s even to write now ……. Family around standing down at the parking lot and suddenly he holds your hand and takes you into the lift pressing away the highest floor and there was this scarf or something that he slips over your neck as you try to hold him or something he pushes you and then again pulls you closer like it felt like you’d met him after long cause it had the same vibes as his coming back from Bangalore meet!!

And something it was and it stays with you and how!!!!!

Jabke it’s been this hectic at work handling too many things on your own and showing around this new intern bout work…

To this continuation again today comes in your ultimate fav black again where you sense his smell initially and that feeeeeeel of being pulled literally pulled holding the neck side of your T-shirt and the second you open your eyes there he was looking his ultimate gorgeously ssxy best in al open black shirt that has your heart kidney and all things in between over it……cause the way he loooks in that shirt like aaj tho it was just name sake shirt there over him jsut cause you looooooovedit on him…….and that side of him like you could see it rush throug him and that one ishaara he does it’s that every string in you fataaaaak se pulled towards him all of you in an instance in the way he looks you in the eye and the second you rush in him the way he was breathing high like you could sense that rush that missing in him!!!!!!!!

Every time you fee him this way that one feeeeeeeeeeel it leaves you with soon as you are up from the dream he missed you that much…….like all of your this missing feels nothing in the way you can feeeel him miss you jsut the way he holds you touches you moves around you sounds of him like all of him making you feeeel away all that n more…

Things you can’t write out obv but the second you wake up today that one strongest rush of missing him with that same restlessness like it’s for sure getting that much more worse by the day charlie like even the random of places make you picture him make you want to have him there with you…….even be it buying groceries the other day and seeing this Chip otle dip pack and just beyond around the store strangely you missed him there with you…

To that jam and you see these school kids crossing the road and one out of em all resembles THAT much of him as a kid…….like that same constant amupto something expression of his as that kid literally movie style stands there smiles away in a way thanking for having stopped and just walks by like that one moennt was literally like watching him there as the most adooooooooooooooooooorablest kid you’d ever seen!!!!!!!

Sooooooo yaaaaaaa Like you just had to rush in the workout and this new thing you’ve been practising late evening coming home from work called as animalflow and today practising it that rush was different it was wilder as the moves are intense takes al of you like you are still trying but to feeeeeel him with these moves over your leg arms and back was something else……..

Like you can sense him breathe touch gently brush against your skin like it’s that strong!!!!!!! Like post these sessions it’s all the more evidently showing on you like you see in the mirror face red that himhighd and two singhs literally in your hair very animalflowy vibes I tell you!!

Whattan irony no to feeeeeeel him this intensely be it dreams or these movements and yet!!!!!!!!!

Some days!!!!!!!!

 When there’s this missing him rush on this level and you decide to early nights so just soooo you can get the workouts in in the mornings cause there’s this constant yearning to feeeeel him away constantly like on a constant mode!!!!!!

The mind the you his words his sounds sense scent feeeeeeeel taste of him in the dreams it’s this shift in you that’s beyond control and beyond you!!!!!!!!!

Even today this rus to get the workout in even with no treadmill and dancing away between the strength training sets too it’s this state of mind this state of you that feels like just like it used to be back then with him in his presence that side of you coming alive now post every dream of him the waaaaaaay it just stays on and over all you…

This random sound find that you click and this waveeeeeeeee of him that it engulfs you awa y in was beyoooooond…….the way it makes every inch of you move sway slow mo and then to feeeeel him touching brushing his hand over you to that sense of him that strong!!!!!!!!

It was beauuuuutofully passionate madness today like again all that’ strength raining session cardio skips everything didn’t really get you hot and sweaty the way these himversions today did like by the end of it your face was red!!!!!!!

That rush of him every single time making you feel and realise THIS mucn feeeeeeeeeeeel for him and otherwise there is not a slightest feeeeel that you feel inside of you…

It’s these frames of him every expressions smiles frowns mimic sounds too like every lil bit of him to all of him rushing thepigh you all the more…….like his dreams are now on a constant upgrade level with every dream and these wishes you make soon as you are up cause that’s how bad and strongly you wish for him to be there even after waking up just so you can feel him same way again after waking up too…….

Today post that wild mode and you had to immediately change and head out cause the carpenter had come to do some fixtures that you’d called for home and had to tell the placements you couldn’t just couldn’t think straight!!!!! Like that state of mind you couldn’t stop smiling and feeeeeling him on your mind and you go back to room put a mask on just so you didn’t have to control your expressions that were beyond your control anyway…….

Just donnooooooooo like it’s always been right from the very start anything him and the waaaaaaaaay it transforms any bit to all of you away and HOW!!!!!!!!!

This rush THIS constant rush and state of you lately!!!!!!!

How do you even tone it down!!!!!  

Even with an ironic song ignoring the lyrics away just the viiibe n sound of the track and the waaaay it was doing things away to your mind imagining picturing him in waaaaays!!!!!!

This you howwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!

How!!!!!

 In between the himversion you had to write out this very moennt how can some random sound find make you feeel this sexy away for him!!!!!!

The waaaaaaaaaaays it’s making you move and feeeeeeel him away right now is beyoooooooooooond!!!!!!

It’s the sound it’s the beat it’s waaaaaay it makes you move and live feeeel sense him away with each move!!!!!!

To live…!

 Something’s nai and thus level of khushi they can bring you is beyond logics…

From the stadium place being your wallpaper all these months to another one of could be places of his and the waaaaaay just seeing it over n over again is taking you back to that very moment wit him…

Himhighd!!

Himhighd and HOW!!!!!

When you start the day with that THAT much him absolute madness that you get ready for work but just wasn’t happened again switch work mode to Himhighd mode take mom along and straight to the lake place it was…

There’s this beauuuuuuuty of that place charlie like the second you are there it’s this strong sense of connection feeling closer to him kinda vibe how why you still donno but that one feeeeeeeeeel!!!!!!!

The very first thing was to capture your bumble blu with that view again same his style cause you just wanted to capture that feeeel that essence of that image captured by him back then…

Every time you mention something bout back then to think of it it’s been 15 years now whowwww saying it out amazes you every single time…still feels like yesterday the moment lived could be the same place cause of the waaaaaaaaaays you feel him there in corners there’s this one spot that directly facing to this sunset like you sit on that table particularly it’s facing the lak as well as the sunset spot……

It’s these wishes when there every single time to be there with him again somethings you write out instead of jus letting it stay on your mind……feels differently!! VERY!!

Like it was today this time that you felt him the strongest ever like in that very moment that rush of him over the lips that one strong sense of missing like you aren’t the only one missing like you could all just feeeeel it rush through you…as your mom talks bout something rnaom that view that one view and picturing him there…….ti just getting off and staying under the trees circling around cause again that toooo brings him along running his hand across your arm as he tries to hold you as you lean outside the window and there’s always his hand over your arm gently sexily brushing away trying to hold your hand……

To ordering something and you check for the drinks there was this black currant something and you order that right away cause again it brings him along from his ice cream place melting moment strawberry strip his fav ice cream but had black currants in it as back then strawberries weren’t this easily available…

And that one had black currants again something before him you never liked but after him it did become your fav too and today too how only you loooooved that drink…

The first thjnf this weekend to try the mandarin vodka mixing away with black currant definitely!!!!!

Like you were that high on him it’s like suddenly laced up with all things him like mom talking everything around just goes blur the mind gets all that beauuuuutifully tied up with all things him…….

Like you could feel it on your skin with goosebumps even when the music there goes out you play yours out loud and just be…

Losing your mind and HOW!!!!!!!

How how only you miss him there!!!!!!!!

To just live that gorgeousness of that place with Him…..

Ultimate wish I say!!!!! One of the ultimate wishes actually!!!!!

Cause it sure is a long list of ultimate things…

To that moment just bout to leave and the couple girl starts to walk out crying as the guy follow and that one feeeeeeeel not a single day not a single moment did he ever let a tear in your eye when with him……

Some feeeeels nai toooo strong!!!!!!

The sunset the lake view the place the vibe the music and above everything else there’s HIM!!!!!!

That one feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel of him when there beyond everything else!!!!!!!

Magic!!!!!

 It’s been getting insanely beautifully difficult to get a hold on your this state of mind!!!!!!

And the waaaaaaays he has been coming this beauuuuuuutiful madness it leaves you with soon as you are up!!!!!

It’s this restlessness of wanting more of him also this state of mind the waaaaaay it plays him on loop from the moments even on the second half shoot day morning you wake up to him when he goes wilder in the black shirt and the waaay it just stays on your mind while shooting too like you play tinlickr loudest possible just so you keep your mind looking at the model fixing the poses making her pose and the aaaaaay the mind keeeps going back to him and the way the music was only adding up to it!!!!!

His lips his face upclosest possible daaaadi of his his nose his forehead his hands his arms his shoulder his skin scent and sound like all of him in frames playing on loop and you keep smiling away which eventually the model notices saying Shriya you are a mood today!! Look at your face today!!!!

And you take a break for a bit rush to the washroom to take a look and your cheeks flushed eyes doing their thing like you just looked different like you used to back with him…

This morning too all of night that one loop that one rush of him he comes in this deep maroon tone full sleeve sweatshirt thing and the way you keep pulling the sleeves up just so you could feel up his skin on the arms and him busy with you around your neck and you keep going back to his sleeves that soft feeel of his sweatshirt to finally watching you struggle for his sleeve that one moennt he takes it complete off and then looks you in the eye and that one moemnt for the first time in dream after that long of having seen him that way that one visual even as you write now this rush sudden goosebumps again!!!!!

Like how do you even get a hold on yourself after that one visual!!!!!!

It’s that rush of him all night to this morning when you wake up that one restlessness of still needing wanting more him!!!!!

And that ironic feeeeel why does it always stop once you wake up why can’t the whole vibe actually continue for real!!!   

To that need to rush for the workout even though this one phase of this workout room has some issue since past few days and even with no treadmill today tho you just had to feeel him kaise bbi……

Strength and cardio session for a few mins turned out more impactful than the cardio too to this post one…….

And as the song plays that first visual at his Versova place first chummi and your usual sound and the waaay still kissing he tries to reach out to his laptop and you open your eyes and stop as you could feel him move and notice he was trying to reach out to his laptop and it was to increase the volume and that one smile of his saying you made the sound and it was flashback so had to increase the volume knowing you and neighbours around chuckles away and gets back to the kiss!!!!

As you were moving today this one track on loop and similar some line brings back this visual of him from Versova to the waaaaaaaaaaay you feeeeeel him away along…….

Like the more you feeeel him this way the more it makes you wish to feeeeeel him this way for really real!!!   

To actually feel his touch teeth sense scent sound taste of him for real as you do these himversions!!!!!!

It’s been whole lotta wishing off late be it soon as you are up with that much him to these post himversions thoughts!!

How like HOW NOW!!!!!!!!!

It’s been showing that evidently on you now!!!!!

This state of mind!!!!!

Moments!!!!

 A track of his playing galti se falling asleep over the couch skipping the dinner away and then to still feeeeeeeeel him away this much!!!!!!

Like all of his face over all of your face and HIW!!!!!!!

This scent and sense of him every single time the waaaaaaaay it leaves you wanting more of him like suddenly this rush nowwwww why just that gentle brush like just brushed you away and woke you up like whyyyyyy couldn’t he stay for more!!!!!!

Ayyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa the way slighted of him lately and the waaaaaay it awakens this side of you to THIS extent!!!!!!!!

Tightly shutting away eyes instantly hoping the moment continues and you realise you weee up and waiting for him to still come…!